All these times contagious, I never been this bored before.. Is this the price I’ve waited for ?

More or less, a cut from one of Collective Soul’s song lyrics, Run, a very well composed one. I used to listen to this song while on a long trip, and it really gave me the sensation of “running away” from everything.” And sometimes, somehow, it feels like a never ending journey to nowhere. Well, not quite true since every trip has it ends for sure. And so did mine.

Well, it doesn’t have anything to do with the rest of this post, of course, it just happened to be the first song I listened while starting this post, quite not necessary, not important, and absurd. And then again, here comes the melancholic post.

Okay, been stagnant again this whole months, I’ve made gravely big mistakes and have to pay the worry for more than a months now, its a very stupid one. Well, at least its over now, I hope. But then again, God just loves me too much. One after another, even though its not as life-threatening as before. Still, the itch makes me stuck to the point of … let say … emptiness ?

Some part of me said I’m a little bit cold, and some others said I became ignorance, and one after another said I’m heartless. While for me, I just don’t know what to do. Well, I got some plan in mind, but then again, somehow, don’t know where to start, or which one to start.

Yeah, I know just thinking and dreaming won’t get me anywhere. Let alone happiness, not even close to a honest smile. I think I forgot how to smile a honest smile, anyway.

Somehow, I really miss my Mom lately. And I’m being random again.