Hum, okay, I understand that my other alter ego has grown much stronger each time passed. Thanks to those gloomy and melancholic thought, twisted relationship, and complete defeat, the perfect situation to get a broken heart shattered into pieces of junk.

I really want to be free, as free as I used to be. Don’t wanna be bothered about all those blurry abstract thing anymore. Two years of stagnancy is enough to get me to nowhere but clinging to my past. The delicate thought of being sarcasmic will leads me to nowhere but hatred.

Well, sometimes life is hard, only those strong enough can gain something up from that, make a way forward and not forgetting about the past. Clearly hard thing to do, especially when you cling to your past too much.

Losing something will always give you something in return, might not be better in some terms, but absolutely means more on other terms. Just need to find it, smile, and embrace the future.

Whats this again? aren’t this post supposed to be an un-melancholic one? whats the difference with your old one? wheres the evil deed that talks to me with its passion when about to start this blog?

No, I’m trying to lecture myself. Trying to find what it means to be here. Trying to get the essence of Shin Arakish Valinsky, my old self before I turned myself into shitty Illyasviel. No, Illyasviel is a great one. He taught me almost every pain I could have. So I know how precious happiness could be. And I guess I pass the exam.

You tried your best, its enough already.

Yes, I know. Sometimes the results might not what I always wanted, but clearly, thats enough.

So, want me to take you somewhere? I’ve promised you to take you out before, to go somewhere over the rainbow, a place where there’s only you and me.

Yeah, I still remember it, it was on another post in this blog.

Now I offer you once more, will you come?

Of course I will. Sorry to keep you waiting for so long. It’s been a year ain’t it?

Yup. No problem, we’re one afterall.

Yeah. Lets get going then. 🙂

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